Parenting | Believe in Magic

by , posted on December 20th, 2012 in Parenting



Pictured: Edmund Gwenn, Natalie Wood, and Maureen O'Hara in a scene from MIRACLE ON 34TH STREET, 1947.

Every December I hit The Wall. We can’t exactly call it exhaustion from shopping, because up until then I’ve pretended that the holiday’s not coming and so haven’t shopped at all. But around the 11th, I suddenly remember that I have these children who will be expecting presents. Kids who write long emotional letters to the Jolly Old Elf that start out “Dear Santa, I know that many children are too thick headed (sorry, but it’s true) to believe in you, but I for one do because I’ve heard you on my grandma’s roof.”

This is it, I grumble to my husband. I just want to blow that whole Santa thing wide open. “Santa” shouldn’t be bringing them anything! They don’t need anything! NOT A THING. Can’t we just tell them about the motherless children in Haiti who need our help? My husband, wise man that he is, has heard this every early December for the last 10 years, and has learned not to respond.

Generally speaking, in a couple of days I come to my senses and begin to fill my Amazon cart.

But this December 14, I watched with horror and heart breaking as news reports came in about ‘bad guys’ and guns and first graders whose gifts would never be greeted with screams of joy. About parents who would only ever know their childrens’ last cries were those of fear.

More graphically than ever – more viscerally, even – the crushing realization came that Christmas is not mine to ‘blow wide open’. The holidays, more than any other time of year, are the time to tell stories of magic, to allow these growing children to believe that anything is still possible.

My role as parent in December? It is not that of a truthteller, a naysayer, a realist. My job, as parent, is to let them believe, for as long as they want to deliberately ignore contradictory evidence. My job is to let them believe that goodness wins, believe that parents aren’t always practical, believe that even though one is budding awkward bumps and growing 3 inches in 3 months, one might still get a doll for Christmas.

This year, more than any other: this year, I want to let them keep magic.


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Comments

6 Responses to “Parenting | Believe in Magic”

  1. cathy olmedillas Says:

    December 20th, 2012 at 2:03 pm

    I hear you. I still believe, and always will. Happy holidays xxxx

    [Reply]

    Kirsten Reply:
    December 20th, 2012 at 10:04 pm

    Oh I am glad, SO GLAD, to hear. I disappoint myself every time I waver, but I know that deep down I believe too. :)

    [Reply]

  2. Meghan Says:

    December 20th, 2012 at 2:55 pm

    I love this more than you could ever know. I love the magic of Santa.

    [Reply]

    Kirsten Reply:
    December 20th, 2012 at 10:05 pm

    I believe that we don’t live with enough magic – that we lose our ability to see it as we age, and that our communities don’t encourage us to see it. I’m delighted by the response to this, that there ARE adults who believe!

    [Reply]

  3. Aliza Says:

    December 20th, 2012 at 4:20 pm

    Yes. This. Yes, indeed.

    [Reply]

  4. momalomsmom Says:

    December 20th, 2012 at 10:39 pm

    It is a sad day indeed when your littlest child decides not to believe in Santa any more. And yet, the magic remains and we all feel it – the magic of lights and evergreens in the house, of secret errands and mom sequestered in her bedroom and mysterious rustling and crinkling, and cookie baking and grandparents visiting and family family family. So we may not believe that Santa is “real”, but the magic is, and that’s what we protect so fiercely – us Moms who push ourselves to the seeming end of our energy to help keep christmas magic. And then find our selves gladly jumping out of bed when those sweet, excited voices wake us up at 5:00 AM on Christmas morning. Oh, how much I love this season!

    [Reply]

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