Bringing Up Baby | Adjusting

by , posted on April 4th, 2013 in Baby

bringing up baby

I think if there is one thing to say so far in my two months of being a mother, it’s that things don’t always go as planned. That your plans may get all screwy when it comes to your child because lets face it, it’s no longer about you, it’s about them. Well that and holy cow, how is it possible that I love someone this much?

The plans not going as planned thing isn’t necessarily a bad thing, it just is. We have all heard it in regards to labor and delivery and in my case it was very true. It didn’t go as planned even in the slightest but you know what? When it was all said and done there she was a beautiful, healthy baby girl. That was my very first lesson in motherhood: put the idea of a perfect birth (or the “perfect plan”) behind you and do what you have to do for the well being of your child. Like getting out of the house now—feed the babe, change the babe, make sure she’s warm enough, strap her in the carseat, get the diaper bag together and an hour and a half later we’re off. Plans, in a timely fashion, you see, are what we’re learning to adjust to most.

It was so easy those first few days in the hospital- snuggle, feed, have a nurse change her diaper, have visitors, have a doctor tell you every thing the baby is doing is totally normal. It was after those blissful, tiring first days when we had to take this little thing home and actually begin raising her that some fears set in. That car ride was both exciting and terrifying.

first weeks adjusting to a new baby

I remember sitting in the backseat (ya know, to make sure she was breathing) and saying to my husband, giddy “This is so fun! But drive really slow!” The unknown of what it would be like with a new human in our home was what scared us most but in all honesty it’s been amazing. I feel truly lucky (and somewhat guilty) that I have yet to feel extremely overwhelmed, exhausted or like this is a job I’m not cut out for. When friends ask me how I’m adjusting I feel like I should say, I’m so tired! This is so hard! How did you do it!? But the truth is, I’m adjusting really well.

Yes, waking every few hours every night is hard but I knew it would be. Watching and hearing her cry and not being able to console her immediately is hard, but so far we’ve been able to figure it out each time (she’s screaming as we speak but I know in a matter of seconds my husband will have figured out what she needs and her cries will quiet- Yep. Silence.)

mama and child

I don’t mean to sound like it’s been a breeze. There have been evenings where I am dog tired and on the verge of tears but I chalk it up to what motherhood is all about and the blessing it is of being this little girl’s mama is such a gift I can’t even begin to put into words.

I’m scared for the day when I’m totally unsure of what to do and when I question if my parenting decisions are the right ones for our daughter, because I know those days will come soon and often. For now I’m still floating on this little cloud of bliss.

What about you? Was the adjustment with your first child good, bad, shocking, overwhelming?

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5 Responses to “Bringing Up Baby | Adjusting”

  1. Jennifer Cooper Says:

    April 4th, 2013 at 10:04 am

    Aww, I remember those days. I love the image of you in the backseat. I rode in the backseat when Ellie was born too. I remember it fondly.

    I had a far different experience though once ours came home. The first couple months were scarring. Both of mine had difficulty nursing. I had to do all these oral motor exercises and had countless trips to the lactation consultant. And I’m pretty sure I suffered from D-MER. Although not diagnosed, the symptoms were exactly how I felt.

    Now that they’re 10 and 7, I can see that it all turned out okay in the end ;)

    So so happy to hear it’s going so well for you!! Such an exciting time. She is such a cutie pie!

    Lindsay Reply:

    Honestly Jen, I think your story, although very hard both physically and emotionally I’m sure, is so common. I don’t know what to chalk my experience up to other than pure luck? I’m not some super woman with a super baby- we just got lucky that things for us clicked and (so far) haven’t had to deal with any major issues. I’m so empathetic towards women who do have some problems with b feeding, baby blues etc because even though things for us have gone pretty smoothly I can totally understand how down right draining those things must be. Thanks for sharing a piece of your experience with us!

    Jennifer Cooper Reply:

    Yes, totally draining. But there were also such sweet and tender moments too. We recently looked back through old photos and it was so emotional—in a totally good way.

    Speaking of, these photos are gorgeous! One day she’ll grow up and look at them and say, “Aww, look at how little I was.”

  2. julia [lifeonchurchill] Says:

    April 4th, 2013 at 11:35 am

    I rode in the backseat when my son was born and remember wanting my husband to drive oh so slow. You have a beautiful perspective. The baby stage was a tough one for me, but not without joy :)

    Lindsay Reply:

    Thank you, Julia! Im so glad I wasn’t the only nervous backseat rider!

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